Offbeat — 02 May 2013

Why do you fight in your marriage

Fights with spouse in marriage are quite common. In fact, no marriage is complete without some kind of fight. By fight, we certainly don’t mean hurling abuses to each other or hitting each other, all we mean is a little difference of opinion here and there and hence a bit of skirmishes now and then. The question is why we fight in marriage despite the fact that we love our spouse most.

At the bottom-line of all kind of bickering in marriage is a difference of perspective. Most of the spouses fight on the matters related to money, in-laws and household responsibilities. There seems to be always a difference of opinion on how finances should be dealt with, how much should be spent on what, who should bear which expenditure (since most of the couples are working these days), etc.

Sometimes one of the spouses is high on spending and low on saving while the other one is low on spending and high on saving. This kind of difference of perspective towards financial management creates rift between otherwise ‘happily married’ couple.

The other sensitive topic between husband and wife is ‘in-laws’. Since no husband and wife come from same family or background, the differences with one’s in – laws are bound to occur. Sometimes, when mutual understanding and respect for each other is low then relationship with in-laws seem to be a sore point. This affects the relationship of husband wife also, as one’s in-laws are other‘s parents.

Other issue that often crops up is about shouldering household responsibilities. Since most of the couples work these days, it gets important to share household responsibilities. If that does not happen then fights become a common occurrence.

Even while fighting, one should not forget that difference of opinions will keep coming and vanishing but your will swim and sink in this life with your spouse only so better try to understand each other and be flexible and sensitive towards with each other’s needs and desires.

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About Author

Ritu Insaan

A homemaker, social worker and a mother, Ritu Insaan holds an MBA degree in Public Health. She has worked in the rural areas of northern India for the upliftment of less privileged sections of society. Whenever she finds free time amidst her busy schedule, she does freelance writing for a number of websites.

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